THE IMPEACHMENT GANG

William Edelen

Copyright, 1998

Henry Hyde's impeachment gang fired off a list of 8l questions for

President Clinton to admit or deny. The moralistic stink of this hypo

-crisy has drifted up all the way through the ozone layer.

We all know about Newt Gingrich's barbaric cruelty to his critically

ill first wife. He's gone now. It's called karma.

But for the rest of the impeachment gang, some questions:

HENRY HYDE (R-Illinois) Do you admit or deny that the five year

adulterous relationship you had with a woman broke up her family? You

called it a "youthful indiscretion" and yet you were 4l years old at the

time.

BOB BARR (R-Georgia) Do you admit or deny that you have dumped two wives

and are now on wife number 3. You who sponsored the l996 Defense of

Marriage Act. And do you admit or deny that at a celebrity fund raiser

BURTON and J.C.WATTS (R-Oklahoma) Do you admit or deny that you both

spent years covering up your out-of-wedlock children? And Mr. football

great Watts, do you laugh every time you tell people your motto:

"Character is simply doing right when no one is looking." What a stand

up comic you are.

KEN CALVERT (R-Calif.) You said 'we can't forgive the President." Do you

admit or deny that you were caught by police in l993 receiving oral sex

from a prostitute and you tried to run from the scene. And do you admit

or deny that you have been sued by your ex wife as an alimony deadbeat?

DICK ARMEY (R-Texas) Do you admit or deny that during your years as a

college teacher before entering Congress, you sexually harassed many

female students, as reported by the "Dallas Observer"?

JOHN PETERSON (R-Pennsylvania) Do you admit or deny sexual harassment

claims by six women? You called it "excessive hugging." The women had a

different description.

Speaker LIVINGSTON (R-Louisiana) HYDE and BOB STUMP (R-Arizona) Do you

admit or deny that you obstructed justice when you were informed by

Robert McFarlane of illegal 'contra' funding as documented by Oliver

North, making you accessories and guilty of breaking the law.

For any of you still living in the fog of naïveté, you should read

GLASS HOUSES: SHOCKING PROFILES OF CONGRESSIONAL SEX SCANDALS AND OTHER

UNOFFICIAL MISCONDUCT by Stanley Hilton and Anne Renee Testa, published

by St. Martin's press, an outstanding publishing house.

I regret that I only have room for a few examples of the moral

obscenities by the Impeachment Militia.

Mark Twain got it right, as usual. "Congress is America's only genuine

criminal class."